Okay so here is my first question about life. Or rather, my observation. Or something... Anyway, have any of you noticed that most people like to be and play with others only when the other is fun or interesting to begin with? Or else it'd be awkward, right? Of course I know know no one would want that awkwardness so it should be all fine, right? I wonder though. What about me who is kind of dull, plain, and not so interesting and fun? What about everyone else. I get sad and this sinking feeling in my chest when I see someone trying to start something with me so we can start a conversation but I am too serious, too boring to even catch on or, if I do, start anything. I know the simple solution is to simply be more myself and bring out my inner fun or not care that they're disappointed, but I do both. I try be fun but the times where I don't succeed and see their face that was anticipating more but didn't get more that I just got to care so gosh darn much about, I get sad.
I care for too many people (nearly everyone I meet or even just see) because I always give the benefit of the doubt. Not out of pity, but because I really believe there's more to them that they let show and reasons behind all their actions and words (may the be good or bad). I'm not ashamed of caring, but I just wish that they'd understand and/or care for me back. I wonder if they already do. I don't know it.
But my point is, why must you always only stay beside someone only because they are interesting to be with?
